Welcome to Holland

by Emily Perl KingsleyPrint Version

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this...

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome To Holland".

"Holland?!?" you say, "What do you mean "Holland"??? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy"But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.So you must go and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around…and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills...Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy...and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned".And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.

But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things...about Holland.

© 1987, by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved. Reprinted with permission of the author.

I found this adroable story on the National Down Syndrome Congress website. I enjoyed it and wanted to share! We are so thankful for our Holland.

Urvina Christmas List

Here is the 2008 Urvina who has who for Christmas. I believe we go around $10-$15 per person.

Giver - Receiver

Jeff - Joe
Valerie - Dave
Joe- Andrew
Adrienne - Zachary
Dave - Gavin
Keri - Benjamin
Sarah - Madilynn
Joshua - Annika
Kelsi - Jeff
Madilynn - Tara
Tara - Sarah
Andrew - Valerie
Gavin - Kelsi
Benjamin - Keri
Annika - Joshua
Zachary - Adrienne

Welcome Zachary!

We have a new nephew. Valerie and Jeff had baby #4 last Sunday night at 11:45PM. We were able to go meet him the next day. He is so little and so handsome. We are very happy to welcome him to the family. If you want pics go to the VanderHoeven link on our page. He is a cutie. We can't wait to see him again.

Annika swim session

Tuesday evening Joe took Annika for a swim therapy session. We met two other families with children with down syndrome. Annika loved it. It was warm like bath water and fun toys for her to play with. It was also really great to meet with other families. The other children were 3 years and 4 months old, both girls. It was really great to meet them. I am hoping to play with them another time. This was the same day as soccer practice so again all the adorable pictures I took are not here. I am hoping the other mom will send me some pics that she took.

We found some hobbies!

So, in lieu of recent posts I have found a hobby for my kids. We enrolled Madi and Gavin into a soccer program. Madi had her first day of soccer practice last Tuesday. She got some cleats, shin guards, and some soccer socks. She was all set and SO excited. I enrolled her in the 5-6year old class. She went out there and after about 5 minutes she came running to me and crying. They took the ball away from me. Ummm....Mad that is how the game is played. The point is to take the ball from other players. She was devastated and wouldn't go back out there. And to add to the drama the only other little girl didn't like it and she left. Ugh..that does not help my cause to go back in there. So, what do I do. I just paid for her class, all of the equipment. Hmmm....So on my way to go get my money back on the class we ran into a lady we know who has a 7 year old daughter. We asked Madi if she would play in the older class because there were a lot more little girls. She went in to the 7-8year old class and did just fine. Whatever...I thought it would be more intimidating being with the older kids but she actually went in. We will see how next week goes. I hope better than this week.

I did enroll Gavin in pee-wee soccer. It is indoor so no cleats required. I hope he likes his class. He will start the beginning of October.

Oh yeah, no pictures of Madi because the memory card was left at home in the printer. So I took my camera just didn't get any of them on memory.

Oh Honey!!

Oh Honey! Is not what I said when I came downstairs this morning to find my Gavin underneath the kitchen table with the honey bear. More like "WHAT IS THIS?" After bathing him and putting on freshly laundered clothing I found my son sitting on the floor in a pool of honey. He had emptied out nearly half of my honey bottle. Sticky and Messy. So I asked him why he made the choice to pour honey on the floor and he said, "...because it was funny!" Umm...NO Gavin it is not funny. So we had to talk about things that are funny and things that are not! This kid needs a hobby! So I made him stay there and sit in it. I then made him clean it up. I don't know what else to do with this kid. I am totally blaming Joey for being so mischievous as a little boy. You all know the saying. "I hope you have a kid just like you." Well, I got a little Joey, is that fair? I am quite sure I was a perfect angel! :)

No pics because you can't really see honey!!! You can just feel it!

Gavin's 1st day of Co-Op Preschool

My friend Krissy and I each have a 3 1/2year old. We have decided to get together once a week to do activities, kind of like a preschool. Gavin and Isaac are best friends. We don't live as close anymore and this is a fun way to get together and do something fun and productive. So for our first day we decided to make cookies together.

Gavin, Isaac, and Buzz Lightyear making snickerdoodles.

Lunchtime.

Krissy, her 2 year old Whitney, and Annika.

Mariners vs. Yankees

We went to the Mariners game last night. A co-worker gave Joe 4 tickets. It was so fun. We made sandwiches bought some peanuts and licorice. We actually made it through the 7th inning before heading to the play land. Woohoo.

4 Mariners tickets/Free Parking - $0.00

Gas/Snacks - $20.00

Great Family Fun - Priceless

Happy Birthday Mom!!

It is my moms birthday today. I just wanted to wish her a Happy Day. She turned ##. What a milestone. I think my mom would disown me for posting her age. My 3 sisters surprised her at her house this morning and took her and John out to lunch. I wish we all could be there too. We love you Grandma Catheryn.

This is a picture of her when she was around 19 or 20. She sent this to my dad when he was in Vietnam. Doesn't she look beautiful?

The First of Many Field Trips

A friend in the ward has planned a Field Trip Friday group. She has planned fun things to do with your kids still at home activities. Yesterday was the beginning. We met at the park and ride, then rode the bus to the Puyallup Fair. It was free to get in between 10Am and 12PM yesterday. It was a fun and eventful day. I just had Gavin and Annika and I though it would be a snap. We were fine as long as we kept moving and had fun things to see.

We got to see the cows & sheep, and that seems about all that we were able to accomplish. Gavin wasn't so patient with all the other children there and the waiting for the other people in the group kind of thing. We stopped and had a picnic lunch on a little patch of grass. He finished and I was feeding Annika. He played with some other kids and then all of a sudden just bolted into the crowd of people. I put Annika down and booked it after him. I couldn't see him and just ran in the direction of where he ran. SO SCARY! I practically hurtled over a bench and finally I saw him. Needless to say we left right after that episode. He then asked me if it was funny! Hmm....NO, it was not funny! What a kid. I won't be doing something like that alone again. I am just glad that I was with friends and knew that little Annika would be safe back on the grass with them. What am I going to do with that kid. He has no fear.

Annika turns 7 months old

Annika trying out a straw.

She loves blowing raspberries!!

Annika turned 7 months old yesterday. I can't believe that she is that old. Here are 7 things we love about Annika.


1. She is SO cuddly.

2. She gets so excited and smiles every time you look at her.

3. She sleeps on her tummy with her little tushy in the air. We always have to take an extra look each night.

4. I love the way she holds her little noggin up while she is on her tummy to look around.

5. She reaches her little arms and hands up to your face and pulls it in for kisses.

6. She is so completely determined at every therapy session and works herself so hard.

7. Her face lights up the whole room when she smiles!!

Seahawks and lemonade!!

Madi has been begging for months now to have her own little lemonade stand. She wanted a sign and the whole bit! Well, I kept delaying the process because well I just didn't want to do it. So, Madi being Miss Independent went and picked wild blackberries with her friend Meghan. I think they ended up with about 12. They smashed them with a spoon and added water. Then they made a sign. "We are Seahawks Fans. Blackberry Juice $1.00". Ok, I thought we don't get to much traffic on this road no worries for them to be selling their blackberry concoction, right! Wrong! Not too much later we heard them screaming, we have a customer. Completely embarrassed, Joe made up some Kool Aid and sent them outside with some of our cups. Not plastic cups we didn't have any!! Her customers were some neighbors that were moving in that day! So they gave the girls some of their plastic cups and paid $1.00 for a cup of Kool Aid. They ended up making $5.00 between the two of them. Then they divided it, one for me one for you one for me one for you, hmm...we have an extra. Let's give it to Daddy! So, Joe made a dollar. Way to go Sweetie! I love the ingenuity of a 6 year old.

First day of First Grade

Madi started school on September 2nd. It is such a big change this year. Full time all day school. I can hardly believe it. You know as moms, Kindergarten was the big year. You cry a little as your baby walks so big to her class and you are no longer there to be with her all day long. I wasn't that way with Madi. It was half days and we were still able to walk her to school and had a lot of time with her. It was more of a nice little break. This year it has kind of hit me that my baby is growing up. She rides the bus, she is gone all day long. She comes home and immediately wants to go to her friends house. We are going through a little Madi withdrawals here. I am completely loving having so much time with Gavin and Annika though. He is always wanting to play with Madi, and now I get to play monsters and transformers! Gavin misses her but is somewhat satisfied with my version of Buzz Lightyear!! We will see. Here are some pictures of my baby girl on her First Day of First Grade!!!

P.S. I think we will have to get another picture of Madi going to school. This pic was the best out of 3!!!!

And as for my little Gavin who still loves his mommy lots!!! We are going to be going on little field trips with other moms in the area. We are also going to be getting together with his best friend Isaac once a week for a co-op preschool.

Labor Day

I know, I know, I know, a little late for a Labor Day post and the posts to follow. I just figure as long as I actually get them up. Yay for me!!! I am hoping that with Madi in school we can get back on a schedule and life will start to mellow out a bit!! Enough of all my excuses. Here is what we did.

We did have a really fun Labor Day. We had Grandma and Grandpa Urvina, Tara, and her sister Ila and Ila's mom Heidi, and Jeff, Val, Sarah, Josh, and Ben over for a BBQ. We ate good food, let the kids play and play, and visited. Oh, and of course a little Wii action!! It is so fun to be with family! We did miss our Button cousins, hopefully next time!!! Congrats to Keri and Dave. They just found out they are having a little girl! Yay more girls! We are also excited for the upcoming arrival of a VanderHoeven Boy! Hopefully coming this month!